You may call me the Hobbler today. Every muscle in my gluts area hurts. And the side of my body. I feel old, but a little energized, but exhausted. I have no idea how one could possibly feel all of those things together, but I do. What a crazy ride this boot camp thing is going to be on my body. I am off boot camp until tomorrow night and I am desperately not trying to think about the agony I will be experiencing on Friday while attempting to leap and dance in class. This week, grace is not my goal, but rather not falling over. Small goal, perhaps I can actually attain it.
I thought I would be fine today, seeing as I made it through all day yesterday with only a twinge. As dusk descended upon our house, so too did pain and stiffness. How could I have barely any pain all day to only bet writhing in pain at bedtime? Either my body is just aging or this too shall pass. I hope for the this too shall pass bit.
One exciting thing about myself that I have totally realized, is that I think I can manage the next 9 classes of this hell. And then I will be conquering my next exercise fear: spinning! I have always wanted to do spinning, but have been so afraid of not being able to do it.
Where does this deep sense of fear come that is rooted in the belly of my soul? I think it can be traced back to grammar school when I was often picked last or next to last because I was not athletically inclined. I remember telling a friend in college that these legs are not made for running. While it is true I have never been a fast runner, I can run when I want to. That I found out while doing Karate in college and ran home one night, and did not even realize that I was running until I arrived at the door in record speed from the origination point.
Anyway, today it is all about optimism and seeing that I can do things. Maybe not fast, but can definitely do them. So, here's to living life in technicolor and not in black and white, siezing the day and really living.
No comments:
Post a Comment